Thursday, June 24, 2010

Local Mom Charged with Neglect of Hair

INDIANAPOLIS - Local mother, Deidra Willows, was arrested today and charged with neglect of her hair when she reportedly left a hair brush in her car. The woman told local authorities she had left the brush in the car for her fourteen month-old child to play with while she was out purchasing a fifth of Dark Eyes Vodka, a pack of Newports, an economy bundle of Pampers and the last remaining copy of Louis Gossett Quarterly from the local drug store.

Officer Todd Thompson made the arrest shortly after he noticed the woman walking out of an alley between Ohio and Wabash streets.

“I was on parking ticket duty when I saw a disheveled head of hair strolling out of the alleyway. After I called for backup, I escorted her back to her vehicle, where she said she had left the brush. I was surprised to find her child in the car gnawing on the brush.” Thompson continued, “I then seized the hair utensil out of the kid’s hands."

The hair brush was taken to a local hair salon where a hair technician observed the brush suffered from severe bite marks after being left with the teething child. There is no time table for when the brush is to be released back to the mane abandoning Willows.

Several onlookers tried to stop Willows from neglecting her hair before she was arrested.

“I didn’t even want to do business with that lady,” said local drug dealer and weekend parking attendant, Diggs "Big Money" Jefferies. “She came at me with that chaotic mess and immediately I assumed meth, but she was looking for that heroin. I tried to sell her a comb too but she wasn’t havin’ it. I’m a little disturbed she left a brush in the car with that child.”

Police have stepped up their efforts to control the raising hair neglect problem that has recently taken the city by storm and have reached out to local citizens to keep a look out as well. Authorities are encouraging metro Indianapolis residents to report any suspicious activity such as: children left unattended in parked cars, blatant smoking of illegal drugs in public, crack teeth, and of course piles of unkempt hair trolling the downtown area. And for their own protection police recommend citizens carry pomade.

Story by Hate Nurst