Friday, July 23, 2010

Friday Sports Shorts

Sweet Lou Due at the End of the Season

Earlier this week, Sweet Lou Piniella announced he will retire at the conclusion of the Cubs' 2010 campaign. The decision was made due to complications with Lou’s ongoing pregnancy. He has been carrying his unborn child since the 2002 MLB season.

Many thought Lou’s pregnancy had ended when the Cubs laid a gigantic egg the first half of this season, but the large bulge protruding from Lou’s abdomen is still present.

Piniella currently has over 1,700 total wins, a .521 winning percentage, six divisional titles and one world series title.

Pacers' Dunleavy Attempting to Put Together ‘Super Team’ in Indy

The latest NBA rumors have Amare Stoudamire, Chris Paul, and Carmelo Anthony plotting to create a super team in New York to compete with Miami. But, few have noticed the latest super team rumors coming out of Indianapolis.

ESPN insiders report Mike Dunleavy has had several visits with Andrei Kirilenko, Adam Morrison, Chris "Birdman" Andersen and Brad Miller to discuss the possibility of playing for the Indiana Pacers next season.

The five were seen at Champps in Castleton on July 8, coming out of the movie ‘Twilight Eclipse’ on July 13 and at Barnes & Noble in Greenwood on July 17. NBA insiders speculate Larry Bird will sign all four players to make a bold statement he is committed to employing overpaid white athletes.

"I think assembling a bunch of mediocre honkeys could have them vying for the 8th seed in the Eastern Conference," says NBA insider Ric Bucher. "Miami, Orlando, Boston and New York beware!"

A Sad Day for Softball Fans

Earlier this week the ridiculously hot face of women’s softball, Jenny Finch, announced she will retire from the sport next month. Finch is known best for pitching the US to gold in the 2004 Olympics

A somber mood has come over fellow players who are attracted to her and all the guys who enjoyed watching her in her tight uniform.

Experts expect average TV ratings for softball games to drop from 0.003 to -4 rating. Other sports such as the WNBA, the LPGA and figure skating still only dream of such great ratings and hope to capitalize on this loss.

Reporting by Dudley Dawson & Hate Nurst